Most parents would give their entire world for the well-being of their children, but sadly, not every child gets to live in a loving home and experience affection, care, and love. Some are neglected and even abused by those who are supposed to provide for them and treat them as jewels.
Four people took to Reddit to tell their life stories and share how beside the injustice and the horrible treatment by their parents they still managed to stand on their feet and turn their lives around. As of their moms and dads, they got what they deserved at the end.
Read their stories below.
Father Needs Son’s Help after Bringing Him up in an Abusive Childhood
In 2019, an individual who identified as Asian turned to Reddit’s “AITA” forum to share a narrative. Recounting his upbringing, the man revealed that his father’s treatment during his childhood was marked by being frequently kicked out of his home.
The family’s financial struggles led them to reside in a subpar townhouse in an unfavorable part of town. Following the common stereotype associated with Asian fathers, the narrator’s dad exhibited extreme strictness regarding academic performance.
If the original poster (OP) received a grade below 70, was tardy to class, or failed to adhere to a curfew, his father’s response was consistent: eviction from the house. Despite his pleas and appeals, he would find himself relegated outdoors with only a sleeping bag, regardless of the weather conditions — rain or snow.
This pattern continued until the age of 16 when a friend extended the courtesy of allowing OP to stay overnight. Each time he was expelled, he would eventually return, apologize, and be permitted to re-enter the home, with him revealing: “[My father] kicked me out at 18 and I didn’t come back home.”
Instead, he opted to stay with a friend and engaged in consistent employment to finance his education. From that day onward, he stopped communicating with his father. Finally, at the age of 29, he found marital bliss with a child on the way.
OP’s mother passed away at the time—a poignant event that brought about a series of unexpected encounters. Amid the atmosphere of mourning and reflection, his father made an appearance at his son’s home, bearing the weight of past grievances. It appeared to be an attempt at reconciliation for the turbulent upbringing that had marked OP’s formative years.
Despite initial perceptions of genuineness, a lingering skepticism arose because OP’s dad had faced his own share of hardships. The closure of his convenience store seven years prior and the deterioration of his pension painted a complex backdrop to the situation.
In a moment that demanded honesty and clarity, the Redditor took the initiative to question his father’s motives for his visit. With a tone of desperation, his dad admitted his intentions—he sought a place to stay. OP, perhaps burdened by a mix of emotions from the past and the present, retreated momentarily into the house.
Upon returning, a sleeping bag was flung unceremoniously onto the lawn—an act loaded with the history of past rejections and a symbol of his dad’s actions. An essential facet of the narrative was inadvertently omitted in the initial retelling. Over time, the father had sought to make amends through sporadic financial offerings sent via mail.
These modest sums, accumulating to around $1500, remained tucked away in the recesses of OP’s closet, which he intended to return at his mother’s funeral reception. Upon the passing of his mother, his wife and friends reacted to his decision.
Matt Heath: My parting message: Enjoy things while they are around
A lot of big, tragic and important things have happened to this wonderful country of ours since April 2014. None of which I have covered. I was too busy writing about hungover parenting, ancient philosophy and my dog Colin.
Out of the 536 columns I have written, 27 were about that guy. Far too few. He is such a good boy, he deserves an article a week.
Today is the end of an era for me, and whenever these final events pop up in our lives, we can’t help but think about the ultimate end.
Everything we do, we will one day do for the last time. That’s why you have to enjoy things while they are around. It’s not just big events like leaving a job, house or loved one either. Whatever moment you happen to be in now, you will never get it back, and you don’t know how many more you have.
Everything we do in life, from eating pizza to spending time with the people we love, to driving, writing, drinking or breathing, we will one day experience for the final time. It might happen tomorrow. This can be either a depressing or an inspiring thought, depending on how you look at it.
A few years back in this column, I interviewed professor of philosophy William B Irvine, of Wright State University, Ohio, on this very topic. He put it this way on a Zoom call: “Recognition of the impermanence of everything in life can invest the things we do with a significance and intensity that would otherwise be absent. The only way we can be truly alive is if we make it our business periodically to entertain thoughts of the end.”
Today’s column is very meaningful to me because it is my last. Like the last night with a lover before she goes overseas. And just like a lover, there have been some half-arsed efforts put in from me over the years. Last week, for example, I spent 750 words moaning about how bad my cricket team is. But the truth is that any of my columns could have been the final. If I had reminded myself every week for the past 10 years that the end is inevitable, I may have been more grateful for having a column and appreciated writing them all as much as I am this one.
While everything we do could have more meaning with a focus on finitude, some things are inherently more worthwhile than others. There is no doubt my column “The pros and cons of wearing Speedos” from November 2022 was less meaningful than most things in this world. That was a waste of everyone’s time. So, if we only have so much time, how do we pick the best things to do?
Well, Oliver Burkeman, the author of Four Thousand Weeks – Time Management For Mortals, suggested this to me in a 2022 column: “Ask yourself, does this choice enlarge me? You usually know on some unspoken level if it does. That’s a good way to distinguish between options.”
With that in mind, I don’t feel great about my 2018 article on “New Zealand’s best hole”. That didn’t enlarge anyone.
There will be people reading this column right now who have loved my writing in the Herald and are sad to see it end. Others will have hated it and are glad to see me go. Many won’t have any opinion at all. But for those in the first camp, I have good news. I have a book coming out on May 28 called A Life Less Punishing – 13 Ways To Love The Life You Got (Allen and Unwin Book Publishers). It’s a deep dive into the history, philosophy and science of not wasting our time lost in anger, loneliness, humiliation, stress, fear, boredom and all the other ways we find to not enjoy perfectly good lives. It’s available for pre-order right now (google it if you’re interested).
A Life Less Punishing took me two years to write and is equivalent in words to 100 of these columns. Which would be a complete nightmare for those in the hate camp, but as I say, great news for those who want more.
Anyway, thanks to the Herald for having me, thanks to the lovely people who make an effort to say nice things to me about my column nearly every day and thanks to the universe for every single second we get.
Bless!
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