My lovely granddaughter gave me a cute garden gnome to make my yard more cheerful. But my nosy neighbor, who can’t stand a little fun, reported me to the HOA for “ruining” the look of the neighborhood. She thought she had won. Oh, how wrong she was!
Hello there! Come on in and take a seat. This old lady has a story that will make you laugh and maybe teach you something, too. Now, I know you might be thinking, “Oh no, not another story about lost love or cheating husbands.” But hold on! This story isn’t about my dear Arnold. Bless his heart; he’s probably up in heaven, flirting with his old crushes!
No, this story is about something that could happen to anyone.
So listen closely because Grandma Peggy is ready to share how a little garden gnome stirred up a lot of trouble in our quiet neighborhood.
But before we get into the details, let me describe where I live. Picture a cozy suburban paradise, where the streets are lined with maple trees and the lawns are greener than a leprechaun’s vest.
It’s the kind of place where everyone knows each other, and the biggest excitement is usually the latest gossip at Mabel’s Bakery.
Oh, Mabel’s Bakery! That’s where the real fun takes place.
Every morning, you’ll find a group of us old-timers, all nearing 80, sipping coffee and enjoying Mabel’s famous cinnamon rolls and croissants. The smell of fresh bread and the sound of laughter spill out onto the sidewalk, drawing people in like moths to a flame.
“Did you hear about Mr. Bill’s new toupee?” Gladys would whisper, her eyes sparkling with mischief.
“Land sakes, it looks like a squirrel took up residence on his head!” Mildred would reply, and we’d all laugh like a bunch of hens.
It’s a peaceful life filled with the simple joys of tending to my garden, sharing recipes, and, yes, the occasional bit of harmless gossip. Then one day, my granddaughter, sweet little Jessie, gifted me the cutest garden gnome I’d ever seen.
This little fella had a mischievous grin that could light up a room and a tiny watering can in his chubby ceramic hands.
“Gran,” Jessie said, her eyes sparkling, “I thought he’d be perfect for your garden. He looks just like you when you’re up to no good!”
I couldn’t argue with that. So, I found him a prime spot right next to my prized birdbath.
Little did I know, I’d just planted the seed for the biggest fuss our neighborhood had seen since Mr. Bill’s toupee blew off at the Fourth of July picnic.
“Oh, Peggy,” I muttered to myself as I stepped back to admire my handiwork, “you’ve outdone yourself this time.”
I had no idea how right I was.
Now, before we dive into the thick of it, let me introduce you to the thorn in my side—my neighbor, Carol, who’s also in her late 70s. Picture a woman who’s never met a rule she didn’t like or a bit of joy she couldn’t squash. That’s Carol for you.
She moved in two years ago, but you’d think she’d been appointed Queen of the cul-de-sac the way she carries on. Always peering over fences, measuring grass height with a ruler, and shooing kids away for no reason.
I swear, that woman’s got more opinions than a politician at a debate.
One afternoon, I was out tending to my petunias when I heard the telltale clip-clop of Carol’s shoes on the sidewalk. I braced myself for another lecture on the “proper way” to trim hedges.
“Well, hello there, Carol,” I called out, plastering on my sweetest smile. “Lovely day, isn’t it?”
Carol’s eyes narrowed as she surveyed my garden. “Peggy,” she said, her voice dripping with fake sweetness, “what on earth is that thing by your birdbath?”
I followed her gaze to my new gnome. “Oh, that’s just a little gift from my granddaughter. Isn’t he a darling?”
Carol’s nose wrinkled like she’d smelled something foul.
“It’s certainly unique. But are you sure it’s allowed? You know how particular our HOA is about maintaining the neighborhood’s aesthetic.”
My smile faltered. “Now, Carol, I’ve lived here for nigh on 40 years. I think I know what’s allowed and what isn’t.”
She raised an eyebrow. “If you say so, Peggy. I just wouldn’t want you to get into any trouble.”
As she clip-clopped away, I couldn’t shake the feeling that TROUBLE was exactly what she had in mind.
A week later, I found out just how right I was. There, stuffed in my mailbox like a dirty secret, was a letter from the HOA.
My hands shook as I tore it open, and let me tell you, what I read made my blood boil hotter than a pot of Arnold’s famous five-alarm chili. The letter said that my gnome was against the neighborhood rules and I had to remove it immediately.
“Violation notice?” I sputtered, reading aloud. “Garden ornament not in compliance with neighborhood aesthetic guidelines? Why, I oughta…”
I didn’t need to be Sherlock Holmes to figure out who was behind this. Carol’s smug face popped into my mind, and I could almost hear her nasally voice: “I told you so, Peggy!”
Now, some folks might’ve caved and removed the gnome, but not this old bird. No sir, I’ve got more fight than a cat in a bathtub.
I marched inside, pulled out my reading glasses, and dug up that HOA rulebook. If Carol wanted to play by the rules, then by golly, we’d play by ALL the rules.
I flipped through the pages until I found the section on garden decor. It stated that residents could have one decorative item in their front yard, as long as it didn’t exceed three feet in height. Well, my gnome was only two feet tall! So I was in the clear!
Feeling triumphant, I decided to send a response to the HOA. I crafted a letter detailing my findings and politely requested that they reconsider their stance on my delightful gnome. With a triumphant grin, I dropped the letter in the mail and waited.
As I flipped through page after mind-numbing page, a plan started forming. A devious, delicious plan that would teach Carol a lesson she wouldn’t soon forget.
“Oh, Carol,” I chuckled, “you’ve really stepped in it this time!”
For the next few hours, I was busier than a one-armed paper hanger. I pored over that HOA rulebook like it was the last novel on Earth. And boy, did I strike gold.
Turns out, our dear Carol wasn’t as perfect as she thought. Her pristine white fence? An inch too tall. That fancy mailbox she was so proud of? Wrong shade of beige. And don’t even get me started on her wind chimes… those things were about as welcome as a skunk at a garden party according to the noise ordinance.
With all this juicy information, I could hardly contain my glee. I carefully documented each of her violations and decided to send a little note to the HOA about them.
After all, if Carol wanted to poke her nose into my garden gnome business, I was more than happy to return the favor. “Let’s see how she likes it when the tables are turned!” I said to myself, giggling as I sealed the envelope and sent it off.
That night, I made myself a cup of chamomile tea and settled in for some well-deserved relaxation, eagerly anticipating the chaos that would unfold.
The next morning, I was up with the birds, perched by my window with a cup of coffee and my binoculars. At precisely 7:15 a.m., Carol’s front door opened.
What happened next was better than any TV show I’d ever seen. Carol stepped out, took one look at her lawn, and FROZE. Her mouth hung open. Then, she let out a screech that could’ve woken the dead.
“What in the name of all that’s holy?!” she shrieked, her voice hitting a pitch that made dogs howl three blocks away.
I nearly spilled my coffee laughing. “Oh, Carol, you ain’t seen nothing yet.”
It turned out that while I was busy gathering evidence against her, my friends from the neighborhood had come together to have a little fun of their own. They had all pitched in to cover Carol’s yard with colorful inflatable lawn decorations. Flamingos, unicorns, and even a giant inflatable Santa were now crowding her once-pristine lawn, turning it into a carnival of chaos.
As Carol stood there, mouth agape, I could barely contain my glee. She stomped around her yard, her indignation growing with each inflatable she spotted. I could practically hear her thoughts racing: “This is unacceptable! How could this happen?!”
Every squeal of outrage made me chuckle harder. “That’s right, Carol. Welcome to my world!” I whispered to myself, feeling like I had pulled off the greatest prank of all time.
I knew I had to see her reaction up close, so I grabbed my trusty hat and headed over to “help” her sort out her lawn situation. After all, I was a good neighbor, right?
As I toddled off, leaving Carol sputtering in my wake, I couldn’t help but feel a little proud. Some people never learn, but sometimes, a garden gnome can teach an epic lesson.
When I arrived at Carol’s yard, I could see her pacing back and forth, hands on her hips, looking more flustered than a cat at a dog show. “What am I going to do about this mess?” she muttered to herself, completely ignoring my cheerful greeting.
“Oh, Carol, dear!” I called out, trying to keep a straight face. “Need a hand with all these delightful decorations?”
She shot me a glare that could have melted ice. “This is not funny, Peggy!”
“Of course it is! Look at how festive it is now!” I giggled, trying to lighten her mood. I offered to help her deflate the colorful invaders, but secretly, I was loving every moment of this small victory.
As the day went on, we worked side by side, and I could see her beginning to calm down, despite her initial outrage. “Maybe it’s not so bad,” she finally admitted, a hint of a smile breaking through her stern facade.
And my little gnome? He’s still there by the birdbath, grinning away. Only now, I swear his smile looks just a little bit wider! It seems he’s not just a decoration anymore; he’s become a symbol of our neighborhood’s spirit, reminding us all to embrace a little fun and laughter, even in the face of a neighbor’s strict rules.
As I looked back at my garden, I felt a warmth in my heart, knowing that sometimes, a touch of whimsy can go a long way in softening even the hardest of hearts. And who knows? Maybe Carol will be inspired to add a little joy to her own yard next time!
5 Creatures That Can Crawl In Through Your Toilet and How to Stop Them
If you are wondering why bugs and other pests pay your bathroom a visit, it’s because of all the moisture. And when we’re talking about the toilet seat, in particular, many people fail to clean it consistently and in detail. Flushing isn’t enough, since there is the residue left behind and that is enough to attract all the wrong guests.
Bright Side wants you to know that many pests can crawl into your house through your toilet and that there are ways to prevent this from happening.
1. Snakes
Snakes just love cool, wet, and dark places and that’s why your toilet pipes can be very intriguing to them. But, what drives them there in the first place is the sewer that has food remnants that they can feed on. When they are finished with their food in the sewer, they will look for a way out and the pipes are the easiest and quickest route. However, you shouldn’t be afraid if you live in a cold environment, since snakes will only sneak up in toilets in warm countries.
It’s usually harmless snakes that crawl through the pipes, like garden or tree snakes. That’s because these snakes are slimmer than venomous ones and can fit through the pipes. Although, some anacondas have appeared in people’s toilets in South America and Australia.
2. Rats
Like snakes, rats are also in constant pursuit of food and our pipes can be very appealing to them. In houses where the toilet and garbage disposal end up in the same pipes, rats are more likely to find a way in. And because their anatomy is very bendy, they can swim through the pipes and hold their breath for minutes before they need air.
So, it’s not just important to discard your food remnants in a trash bag but to also never flush food down the toilet. If there is no food in the pipes, rats won’t have any reason to try and enter your sewage system. You should also keep the toilet cover closed at all times and maybe install a rat guard. This allows water to exit the pipes whenever you flush, but nothing can come up in the opposite direction.
3. Spiders
With spiders, things get a bit more complex, since they can’t swim in your pipes, but they can appear in your bathroom through another passage. And when they get in, they will probably sit outside the toilet seat. Only black widows will crawl inside the toilet and weave their web from side to side. But, that will happen only in an outdoor toilet that doesn’t have plumbing and that isn’t connected to a sewer system.
That’s where these venomous spiders thrive since there are many flies that they can catch for food. That’s also why you need to always check the seat thoroughly before using an outhouse toilet. Spiders, like the black widow, the brown recluse, and the hobo spider won’t have any trouble biting you.
4. Lizards
In the Southwest United States, lizards coming through the toilet pipes are a quite common occurrence. That’s because these creatures love water and they try to find food wherever they can. Crickets and other insects (like flies) can be found a lot in your toilet’s plumbing if it’s not kept decently clean. The lizards that can achieve this are usually small enough that they can fit through the pipes.
5. Possums
In 2008, a man was in his bathroom in Australia when he saw the water in the toilet gurgling. Moments later, a baby possum appeared and this is not the first time this has happened. On another occasion, a woman found a dead possum in her toilet. These unusual guests are excellent swimmers and can hold their breath for a long time — that’s why they can crawl into your toilet.
How to prevent and react to these occurrences
- Keep your toilet clean: This may sound obvious, but you really need to clean your toilet often and neatly. Disinfecting cleaners are perfect for that job and if you want something cheaper you can resort to white wine vinegar or baking soda. You can also get one of those fresheners that stick on the side of the toilet and release a nice smell every time you flush.
- Keep it dry: Most pests love humidity and that’s why they will be attracted to wet bathroom floors. So, it’s important to get rid of any standing water from the sink or the floor after you’ve taken a shower. If you notice any leaks in your plumbing, call a technician immediately and get them fixed.
- Clean your pipes naturally: In a bowl, add equal parts of sugar, water, vinegar, and 5-10 drops of dish soap. Mix all of this together and pour it down the toilet or in your bathroom sink. You can also pour some boiling water into the toilet.
- Call a pest control company: If you don’t have the time or courage to deal with pests yourself, call professionals and let them use their heavy cleaners. After that is done, you can occasionally throw water mixed with a cleaning solution down the drain to make sure no pest will climb up into the toilet.
Have you ever found an uninvited guest in your toilet — if so, what was it and how did you react?
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