Navigating changes in a relationship, particularly those related to physical appearance, can be a delicate and emotional journey. A Bright Side reader is having a hard time after his wife underwent plastic surgery. He shared a letter with us seeking our advice.
He shared his side of the story.
Here are some tips that we believe can help you.
- Reflect on Your Feelings: Take some time to reflect on your feelings and understand why the changes in your wife’s appearance are affecting you. Are your concerns purely aesthetic, or do they come from deeper emotional reasons? Understanding your own feelings will help you communicate more effectively with your wife.
- Communicate Honestly and Compassionately: Approach the topic with empathy and compassion. Let your wife know that you love her deeply and that your concerns come from a place of care. Use «I» statements to express your feelings without placing blame.
- Focus on Emotions, Not Criticism: Avoid criticizing your wife’s appearance directly. Instead, focus on expressing how the changes make you feel. For example, you might say, «I miss the unique features that made you who you are,» rather than, «You don’t look like yourself anymore.»
- Reassure Her of Your Love: Make sure your wife knows that your love for her goes beyond physical appearance. Reassure her that you’re committed to supporting her through any challenges she faces, including those related to self-image.
- Encourage Open Dialogue: Encourage open and honest communication between the two of you. Create a safe space where both of you feel comfortable expressing your thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment.
- Seek Professional Help If Needed: If you find it difficult to navigate these conversations on your own, consider seeking the help of a therapist or counselor. A professional can provide guidance and support as you work through your feelings together.
- Focus on Shared Activities: Spend quality time together engaging in activities that you both enjoy. Focus on building emotional intimacy and strengthening your bond as a couple.
- Support Her Self-Esteem: Encourage your wife to focus on aspects of herself that she feels confident about, aside from her appearance. Remind her of her strengths and accomplishments.
- Be Patient and Understanding: Remember that adjusting to changes in appearance can be a complex process, and it may take time for both of you to adapt. Be patient with each other and offer support along the way.
- Explore Ways to Reconnect: Find ways to reconnect as a couple and reignite the spark in your relationship. Whether it’s through shared hobbies, romantic gestures, or simply spending quality time together, prioritize nurturing your connection.
By approaching the situation with empathy, understanding, and open communication, you can navigate this challenging time with grace and compassion.
11 Characters That Were Pregnant in Real Life, and What Their Babies Look Like Today
Participating in the filming of a series or movie is hard work since celebrities have to get into the skin of their characters to achieve an authentic interpretation. But that doesn’t mean that actors don’t have real lives behind the scenes. Sometimes, actresses decide to become mothers and already have contracts with production companies. This presents a challenge for them, because of their pregnancy, and for the filmmakers who have to decide whether to incorporate the belly into the plot or simply let the actress cover her belly.
Bright Side made a list of 11 celebrities who played during pregnancy (some of them had to hide their belly) and is revealing what these kids that made things complicated for their mothers and producers look like today.
1. Julia Louis-Dreyfus in Seinfeld
During the shooting of the third season of the popular sitcom, Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus became pregnant with her first child, Henry Hall. Baby Henry was born in July of 1992. However, the actress’s pregnancy was never really a problem for the producers of the series. The simple solution writers came up with was to put her character, Elaine, in baggy clothes and any large garments to hide her belly. Henry is currently 29 years old.
2. Claire Danes in Homeland
You probably know actress Claire Danes because of the amazing performance she delivered as the CIA agent, Carrie Mathison, in the television series, Homeland. However, what’s not often talked about is the fact that she was 8 months pregnant when she completed the filming of the second season. Her pregnancy could not be introduced in the plot due to her character, so they decided to use digital retouching to hide her belly. Her son, Cyrus, was born in December 2012, and he’s now 9 years old.
3. Ellen Pompeo in Grey’s Anatomy
During the filming of the sixth season of one of the most popular drama series ever created, Grey’s Anatomy, producers decided to hide Ellen Pompeo’s pregnancy from the cameras. This was done because, for the writers, this was not the right time for her character, Dr. Meredith, to have a baby, and they wanted to keep that for a later moment. In September 2009, Stella Luna, now 12 years old, was born.
4. Zooey Deschanel in New Girl
Zooey Deschanel was 7 months pregnant when season 5 of the hit series, New Girl,was shot. As you probably remember, the actress had to be momentarily replaced by Megan Fox since producers were only able to hide her belly for no more than a few episodes. Deschanel also had to stay off the series until she returned from postpartum rest. Zooey gave birth to her daughter, Elsie, in August 2015, and today the little girl is 5 years old.
5. Holly Marie Combs in Charmed
Holly Marie Combs, who plays Piper, one of the main characters of the series, Charmed, announced during the shooting of the sixth season that she was pregnant. The producers thought it was better to hide her pregnancy at first. However, after a while, they decided that it was better for her character to actually have a child in the story as well. Apparently, Piper’s pregnancy was planned before the actress knew she was expecting a baby, so that came in handy. Combs gave birth to her first child, Finley Arthur, in 2004, and he’s now 17 years old.
6. Amaia Salamanca in Velvet
Amaia Salamanca’s pregnancy was well-planned when she rejoined the set of Velvet, a show about the compelling Spanish story of a fashion house in Madrid in the late ’50s. Because of this, production had no choice but to make Barbara, her character, pregnant as well. At the age of 28, she gave birth to her first child, a girl named Olivia Varo, in April 2014.
7. Kerry Washington in Scandal
Kerry Washington’s pregnancy happened right in the middle of the shooting of the series, Scandal, in which she played the main character. This unforeseen event forced producers to reduce the number of episodes to hide the actress’s pregnancy that couldn’t fit the schedule of the series. Currently, her daughter, Isabelle, is 7 years old.
8. Kristen Bell in House of Lies
The star of the House of Lies TV series, Kristen Bell, was about 6 months pregnant with her first daughter when the second season of the show was about to be shot. In order to actually film some episodes, the producers had to hire a body double for the scenes in which Bell would have had to show her belly. Her first daughter, Lincoln Bell, is now 8 years old.
9. Cobie Smulders in How I Met Your Mother
Actress Cobie Smulders brought her character, Robin, to millions of small screens thanks to the sitcom, How I Met Your Mother. After fellow actress Alyson Hannigan told the show-runners that she was pregnant, Cobie Smulders discovered that she was also pregnant and told the producers who had to camouflage both of their pregnancies. To disguise Smulders’ belly, producers asked the costume designers to use garments and objects that could hide her abdomen, and they had the character remain seated for most of the scenes that she appeared in. In May 2009, the actress gave birth to her daughter, Shaelyn.
10. Madonna in Evita
Madonna, also known as the Queen of Pop, made the controversial 1996 film in which she played the wife of Argentinian dictator Juan Domingo Perón, Eva Perón. However, Madonna was pregnant with her daughter, Lourdes Leon, back then. It was because of this that the crew of Evita cleverly used costumes and camera shots so that it was not noticeable that Madonna was pregnant with her eldest daughter who is now 24 years old.
11. Lisa Kudrow in Friends
When Lisa Kudrow played Phoebe Buffay on one of the most famous sitcoms, Friends, she became pregnant. This was right about when they started filming the fourth season. The producers decided to include her pregnancy in the story by having Phoebe lend her womb to her brother to conceive triplets because he and his wife couldn’t have kids on their own. Today, her only son, Julian, is 23 years old.
What is your favorite family series? What do you think of women who work while pregnant?
Preview photo credit Friends / Bright/Kauffman/Crane Productions, and, co-producer, lisakudrow / Instagram
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