Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue actually wrote the marital handbook.
The long-married couple’s book, What Makes a Marriage Last: Insider Stories, contains personal facts about their marriage. Forty Well-Known Couples Share Their Secrets with Us.
The most fascinating revelation made by Marlo is that, even though she and Phil have been married for over 40 years, she never really wanted to get married.
The famous person expressed in the book her previously negative opinion of the institution, saying that marriage is like a vacuum cleaner that sucks away all of your ambition and vitality when you stick it to your ear.
Thomas frequently shares her opinions, likening marriage to having to placate a prisoner. That is, until she met Donahue.
Phil Donahue and Marlo Thomas met following the dissolution of their first marriage, and they have remained lifelong friends ever since.
The Phil Donahue Show, which was eventually renamed as simply “Donahue,” was the vehicle through which Phil Donahue first gained popular recognition. For the first time, audience members participated in the program, which ran for 29 years. One of the visitors on his show who radically changed his life’s trajectory was Marlo Thomas.
The book claims that the two met in 1977 in Chicago, when Phil was bringing four children with him. His fifth child, a daughter, lived somewhere else with her mother and ex-wife.
Marlo and Phil dated for three years before being married in 1980 in front of a small wedding party of thirty-five guests.
Not surprise, Marlo’s friends and family were taken aback by the actress’s sudden change of heart. A hilarious story of Marlo’s bridal shower, where visitors hung notes from the soon-to-be bride that disclosed her past views on marriage, is featured in the couple’s book.
The book claims that Marlo’s mother was the most shocked of all, asking Donahue, “How did you get her to do this?” throughout the nuptials of the pair.
Reportedly, among other emotions, even total strangers voiced shock at the well-known social activist’s decision to get married. While Phil was in the lavatory, a passenger on the airplane the couple took to Greece for their honeymoon expressed displeasure to Marlo, presumably disappointed that she had given up her old independent streak.
In the book, Thomas is honest enough to acknowledge that something was unclear when they spoke. After all her life condemning marriage, was she suddenly a hypocrite for getting married? Had she let those down who held her in high regard as the embodiment of self-reliance?
Even though Donahue and Thomas discuss the usual ups and downs of their long marriage in the book, they manage to make their marriage work to this day. They describe these problems as teaching moments that deepened their relationship.
The couple had been apart from the beginning of their marriage, with Phil traveling to Chicago to tape his show and Marlo traveling to pursue her acting career.
Thomas had a greater understanding of how different individuals define marriage when his aunt said that the couple’s union was void because they weren’t living together exclusively. In spite of their separation, Thomas and Donahue were able to keep their marriage together. Significantly, Marlo’s marriage resulted in her having children.
In a 2012 interview with AARP, Thomas reflected on her experience helping Phil raise his kids, stating she went into it knowing that they already had a traditional mother and that would not be her role.
Rather, Marlo claims that she began to treat Phil’s children more like friends in an effort to mimic the parenting style of her own mother. She continues by saying that she feels more connected to them today than she did at the start of their marriage.
Donahue points out that Thomas really did strive to understand the lads in the book and spent as much time as she could getting to know his sons.
Phil and Marlo believe that their long marriage is a result of her strong bond with his kids and their mutual faith in each other. “You build trust when you realize that this person always has your back,” says Marlo in clarification.
Despite being married for more than 40 years, they still have more memories to make.
Phil goes on to argue that a marriage has to be desired by both parties in order for it to last. Marlo says she would never want to be anything other than married to her lover, echoing his sentiments. She claims that Donahue has assisted her “in every manner possible.”
When two people truly commit to one another, marriage is an incredibly lovely union that is made much more beautiful.
These two have a lot to teach and inspire us all. As satisfying as their relationship is, we should all strive to be in one!
My Friend Asked Me to Find out What Her Date Thinks of Her While I Was in a Clown Costume, but I Had No Idea How It Would End — Story of the Day
Being a radio host who gives dating advice doesn’t make navigating love any easier—especially when I crashed my best friend’s first date dressed as a clown. What happened that night was unexpected, and now I’m caught in a situation I never saw coming. Sometimes, life takes you where you least expect.
Once again, I found myself in Lucy’s cozy kitchen, she animatedly talked about yet another man who had caught her attention. Lucy’s love life was always buzzing with activity, unlike mine.
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Finding a partner wasn’t easy for me—I didn’t want to date just to avoid being alone.
I believed it was better to wait than to settle, even if that meant coming home to my cat instead of a husband.
“He’s perfect!” Lucy said, pulling me out of my thoughts. “We’ve been texting nonstop. He’s so sweet. I think he might be different.”
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“So, you haven’t actually met him yet?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Not yet, but we’re meeting Friday. I’m so excited. I can feel this is going to be great!” she said.
I smirked without meaning to.
“What’s that look for?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.
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“Nothing. It’s just… you don’t even know him yet. People can seem amazing online but be completely different in real life,” I said.
“You’re so distrustful. That’s why you don’t have a man,” Lucy replied, crossing her arms.
“I don’t have a man because men are idiots,” I said with a shrug.
“Not Mike. He’s wonderful. I think he might even be the one,” she said.
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“Listen to your heart,” I replied. That was my go-to advice, though Lucy said it about every guy she met.
After that evening, I forgot about Mike and Lucy’s upcoming date—until Friday arrived, and I received a message from her.
There I was, dressed as a clown, surrounded by kids—my niece’s friends—because my brother had forgotten to hire an entertainer for her birthday party.
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The striped clown suit was too tight, and the red wig itched like crazy. I could feel sweat dripping down my back as kids tugged at my oversized shoes and poked my sides.
“Well, you can do it,” my brother had said, as if asking me to juggle balloons and make kids laugh was no big deal.
“I’m a radio host, not an entertainer!” I snapped.
“It’s basically the same thing,” he replied with a grin.
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Even though I wanted to storm out, we both knew I wouldn’t. I always stepped in for family, no matter how ridiculous the request.
As I tried to keep the kids from snatching my wig, my phone buzzed in my pocket. I quickly checked it, careful to keep my clown nose in place.
@Lucy
When will you be free???
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@Me
About half an hour
@Lucy
I need your help!!!!
@Me
What happened??
I frowned. Lucy was on her date with Mike. Had something gone wrong?
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@Lucy
I don’t know if Mike likes me! I need you to find out!
@Me
How am I supposed to do that?
@Lucy
You do this all the time on your radio show!
@Me
I’m in a clown costume!!!
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@Lucy
Pleaseeeeeee
@Me
Fine, but you owe me.
@Lucy
Thank you thank you thank you!!!!!!!
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I sighed, stuffing my phone back into my pocket. After peeling off the kids and saying goodbye, I messaged Lucy for the location and called a cab.
When I walked into the dimly lit bar, Lucy spotted me instantly and waved enthusiastically.
I hesitated, adjusting my ridiculous clown wig as a group of strangers gave me confused looks. Taking a deep breath, I made my way to their table.
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Lucy beamed as I sat down. “Mike, this is Trish, my best friend,” she said.
“Nice to meet you,” Mike said. His eyes briefly flicked to my bright red nose.
“Hi,” I replied, trying to ignore how ridiculous I looked.
Lucy launched into small talk, but the conversation quickly shifted. Mike mentioned a classic movie, and I couldn’t help but jump in.
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“You’re into old films?” I asked, intrigued.
“Big time,” Mike said, his face lighting up.
We exchanged favorite titles, diving into directors and scenes. Lucy fidgeted, looking uninterested. I tried to change topics, but Mike kept steering it back.
When Lucy excused herself, I leaned in. “So, what do you think of Lucy?” I asked.
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“Um… I mean, she’s cute,” Mike said, glancing away like he wasn’t sure how to answer.
“Nice? Lucy is more than cute. She’s amazing,” I said, my voice firm. “She’s funny, smart, and a great cook. I go to her place for dinner sometimes because I can’t stand cooking.”
“I love cooking,” Mike said, smiling a little.
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“See? You two already have something in common,” I said, trying to be encouraging. But then he looked right at me.
His eyes seemed to study mine, and for a moment, I felt something strange. It was like a spark, something unexpected. My cheeks got warm, and I quickly smiled back.
“But I don’t want to argue over who cooks dinner,” Mike said, breaking the moment. “There should only be one chef in the kitchen.”
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I laughed. “So, you’re the chef?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Always,” he said with a grin, and we both laughed.
Just then, Lucy returned to the table. “What’s so funny?” she asked, looking between us. “Were you talking about me?”
“Sort of,” I said.
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Mike’s phone buzzed, and he excused himself to take the call. The moment he left, Lucy turned to me eagerly. “So? What does he think of me?”
“He thinks you’re cute,” I said carefully. “What do you think of him?”
“I don’t know,” she said, her brow furrowing. “Watching you two, I feel like he’s more your type.”
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“Pfft. What? No. What? No,” I stammered.
“Not very convincing,” she said with a smirk.
“It doesn’t matter. He’s your date,” I said firmly. “There’s a rule—never go after your friend’s guy.”
“It’s just a first date,” Lucy said with a shrug. Then she smiled. “But I’m glad you reacted like that—I think I really like him.”
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I smiled back, but deep down, something felt off. A tiny pang of sadness hit me, and I wasn’t sure why.
We stayed a bit longer, and I tried to shift the focus so Mike and Lucy could talk.
But every time I said something to steer the conversation, Mike directed his answers back to me. It was hard not to notice, and Lucy didn’t seem thrilled.
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When we decided to leave, Lucy headed to the restroom again, leaving me alone with Mike. The night air was cool, and I shivered a little.
“So, do you work as an entertainer?” Mike asked, his tone light.
“Why do you ask?” I replied, narrowing my eyes playfully. Then I saw him glance at my outfit, and it hit me. “Oh, no! I host a radio show. Dating advice, mostly. My niece had a birthday party, and my brother forgot to hire an entertainer.” I gestured to my clown costume with a sheepish smile.
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“Well, that’s bold of you,” Mike said, grinning.
“It was fine until the kids tried to tear my costume apart. They’re little savages,” I joked.
Mike laughed. “Kids can be wild. They’ve got endless energy.”
“Yeah, but they mean well,” I said.
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He paused. “Listen, Trish…” he began, his voice softer, but before he could finish, Lucy appeared.
“Want to walk me home?” she asked him brightly. “I live close by.”
“Of course,” Mike said, stepping toward her.
He turned back to me, and we both hesitated. He went for a hug while I offered a handshake, and we ended up with an awkward high five.
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It made us laugh, but as they walked away, I felt something strange, a little twist in my chest.
The next few days passed quietly. Lucy didn’t say much about Mike, which was unusual for her.
She only mentioned that he hadn’t wanted to come up to her apartment after their date.
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She shrugged it off, but I could tell she wasn’t thrilled. I didn’t press her for details.
One morning, as I was sipping my coffee, my phone buzzed. It was a text from an unknown number.
@Unknown
Hey 🙂 It’s Mike. I know this is weird, but would you like to meet up sometime?
I stared at the screen, my stomach flipping.
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@Me
How did you get my number?
@Unknown
Secret 😉 So, what do you think?
I frowned, trying to steady my thoughts.
@Me
Sorry, I don’t go on dates with men my friends like.
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@Unknown
Lucy and I only had one date. But I haven’t felt a connection like this in years—with anyone. Not until I met you.
My chest tightened. I stared at the words longer than I should have.
@Me
Sorry, but no.
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I set my phone down. Saying no felt like the right thing, but his words lingered, leaving a knot I couldn’t untangle.
I tried to shake it off and focus on work. During my radio show, I put on my usual cheerful voice, pretending my own heart wasn’t a mess.
“Hi, this is Trish. How can I help with your love troubles?” I said, wishing someone could help with mine.
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“Hi,” a man’s voice said, calm and familiar. “I don’t date much. It’s hard for me to find a connection with someone. But recently, I went on a date with one woman. Her friend showed up in a clown costume. And, well, with the friend, I felt something I haven’t felt in years—maybe ever.”
I froze. My heart skipped a beat. It was Mike.
“But she won’t go out with me. She says it’s wrong. I don’t know what to do,” he said. “I really like her.”
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My mouth went dry. “Maybe you should listen to her and let it go,” I managed, my voice unsteady.
“She’s unforgettable. The kind of person who stays with you for a lifetime,” he said softly.
I smiled, caught off guard. “You probably just think that because she was wearing a clown costume,” I said, my tone lighter.
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“I’d remember her no matter what she wore,” he replied without hesitation. “So, will this girl go out with me?”
I hesitated, feeling torn. “I’m afraid that’s impossible,” I said quietly.
Before I could say more, my producer buzzed in. “Take the next call—it’s important,” she said.
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I switched lines. “Go out with him! You have my blessing!” Lucy yelled through the line. I blinked, stunned. “Finally, a guy you like!”
“But you like him,” I stammered, realizing we were still live.
“Not really. He likes you,” Lucy said.
“It’s not right,” I protested weakly.
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“Forget right or wrong. Listen to your heart. You always say that to others. Take your own advice for once,” Lucy urged.
“So, what do you say?” Mike’s voice came back, gentle but insistent. “Her friend gave her blessing.”
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I sighed, my walls crumbling. “Yes,” I whispered.
The sound engineer played an applause track, and I couldn’t help but laugh. My face burned as I blushed, feeling completely exposed—but strangely happy.
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If you enjoyed this story, read this one: Attending my daughter’s wedding was supposed to be a joyful moment, but facing my ex-husband and his new wife turned everything upside down. Old wounds resurfaced, and new betrayals came to light. I thought I’d left the past behind, but this trip forced me to confront truths I wasn’t ready to face.
This piece is inspired by stories from the everyday lives of our readers and written by a professional writer. Any resemblance to actual names or locations is purely coincidental. All images are for illustration purposes only. Share your story with us; maybe it will change someone’s life.
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