A lot of big, tragic and important things have happened to this wonderful country of ours since April 2014. None of which I have covered. I was too busy writing about hungover parenting, ancient philosophy and my dog Colin.
Out of the 536 columns I have written, 27 were about that guy. Far too few. He is such a good boy, he deserves an article a week.
Today is the end of an era for me, and whenever these final events pop up in our lives, we can’t help but think about the ultimate end.
Everything we do, we will one day do for the last time. That’s why you have to enjoy things while they are around. It’s not just big events like leaving a job, house or loved one either. Whatever moment you happen to be in now, you will never get it back, and you don’t know how many more you have.
Everything we do in life, from eating pizza to spending time with the people we love, to driving, writing, drinking or breathing, we will one day experience for the final time. It might happen tomorrow. This can be either a depressing or an inspiring thought, depending on how you look at it.
A few years back in this column, I interviewed professor of philosophy William B Irvine, of Wright State University, Ohio, on this very topic. He put it this way on a Zoom call: “Recognition of the impermanence of everything in life can invest the things we do with a significance and intensity that would otherwise be absent. The only way we can be truly alive is if we make it our business periodically to entertain thoughts of the end.”
Today’s column is very meaningful to me because it is my last. Like the last night with a lover before she goes overseas. And just like a lover, there have been some half-arsed efforts put in from me over the years. Last week, for example, I spent 750 words moaning about how bad my cricket team is. But the truth is that any of my columns could have been the final. If I had reminded myself every week for the past 10 years that the end is inevitable, I may have been more grateful for having a column and appreciated writing them all as much as I am this one.
While everything we do could have more meaning with a focus on finitude, some things are inherently more worthwhile than others. There is no doubt my column “The pros and cons of wearing Speedos” from November 2022 was less meaningful than most things in this world. That was a waste of everyone’s time. So, if we only have so much time, how do we pick the best things to do?
Well, Oliver Burkeman, the author of Four Thousand Weeks – Time Management For Mortals, suggested this to me in a 2022 column: “Ask yourself, does this choice enlarge me? You usually know on some unspoken level if it does. That’s a good way to distinguish between options.”
With that in mind, I don’t feel great about my 2018 article on “New Zealand’s best hole”. That didn’t enlarge anyone.
There will be people reading this column right now who have loved my writing in the Herald and are sad to see it end. Others will have hated it and are glad to see me go. Many won’t have any opinion at all. But for those in the first camp, I have good news. I have a book coming out on May 28 called A Life Less Punishing – 13 Ways To Love The Life You Got (Allen and Unwin Book Publishers). It’s a deep dive into the history, philosophy and science of not wasting our time lost in anger, loneliness, humiliation, stress, fear, boredom and all the other ways we find to not enjoy perfectly good lives. It’s available for pre-order right now (google it if you’re interested).
A Life Less Punishing took me two years to write and is equivalent in words to 100 of these columns. Which would be a complete nightmare for those in the hate camp, but as I say, great news for those who want more.
Anyway, thanks to the Herald for having me, thanks to the lovely people who make an effort to say nice things to me about my column nearly every day and thanks to the universe for every single second we get.
Bless!
TV Star with Māori Face Tattoo Shuts Down Haters in Epic Response!
A TV presenter with a traditional Māori face tattoo has calmly replied to negative comments from a viewer, proudly standing up for her cultural heritage and identity.
Facial tattoos often spark debates online. Some people think tattoos should only be on the body, while others understand and appreciate their cultural importance.
Oriini Kaipara, 41, made history when she became a newsreader for New Zealand’s Newshub. She is the first primetime TV news presenter to wear a moko kauae, a special facial tattoo for Māori women.
The Māori are the indigenous people of mainland New Zealand. They see moko kauae as important symbols of their heritage and identity. These tattoos, traditionally on the lips and chin, show a woman’s family ties, leadership, and honor her lineage, status, and abilities.
Oriini Kaipara. Credit: Oriini Kaipara / Instagram.
Despite receiving praise, one viewer named David expressed his dislike for Kaipara’s moko kauae in an email to Newshub.
He wrote, “We continue to object strongly to you using a Māori newsreader with a moku [moko] which is offensive and aggressive looking. A bad look. She also bursts into the Māori language which we do not understand. Stop it now,” according to the Daily Mail.
But Kaipara didn’t let David’s negative words stop her. She bravely shared screenshots of his messages on her Instagram story and responded calmly.
“Today I had enough. I responded. I never do that. I broke my own code and hit the send button,” she wrote on her Instagram story alongside a screenshot of David’s message.
Kaipara didn’t just share screenshots of David’s email, she also responded to him. She explained that his complaint wasn’t valid because she hadn’t broken any rules for TV.
She also corrected David’s spelling mistake. He called her tattoo a “moku” instead of “moko”.
In her email back to him, Kaipara said, “I think you don’t like how I look on TV. But tattoos and people with them aren’t scary or bad. We don’t deserve to be treated badly because of them.”
She asked him to stop complaining and to try to understand better. She even joked that maybe he should go back to the 1800s if he couldn’t accept people with tattoos.
Despite David’s negative words, Kaipara says she mostly gets nice comments, and mean ones are rare.
In an interview with the New Zealand Herald, Kaipara talked about how it’s important to have more Māori people in important jobs. She said, “The fact that my existence makes some people upset shows why we need more Māori people in every job.”
Kaipara’s calm response reminds us how important it is to be proud of who you are, even when people are mean. She’s inspiring others to be proud of themselves and stand up to unfair treatment.
What do you think of this story? Share your thoughts in the comments!
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