I just discovered that occasionally extreme tactics are necessary to get your message across to someone. Grounding my grandchildren for what they did to my wife wasn’t going to be a sufficient lesson in this case. I set them a challenging task to ensure their redemption. I, Clarence (74), have always thought my wife Jenny (73), is the loveliest and most kindhearted person. This was particularly true with regard to our grandchildren. She knits them exquisitely detailed sweaters every year for their birthdays and Christmas. She puts all of her heart into this tradition. She would frequently begin new initiatives more earlier than necessary.
This was done to guarantee that every child received a unique item created particularly for them. She would make the kids stuffed animals for their birthdays. Maybe a blanket for the grandchildren who are older. We just had a trip and decided to stop by our neighborhood thrift store last week. For our landscaping project, we were trying to find some old-fashioned pots. What was supposed to be a relaxing trip became an unforgettable, heartbreaking experience!Something I wish we could take back from our shared history. My wife stopped as we were browsing the aisles. Her gaze fixed on something, causing her to momentarily stop. “What the heck is that? She questioned, gesturing with a quivering finger, “Am I seeing things? The sweaters she had crocheted for our grandchildren were hanging there among a gazillion other trashed stuff! All of them were for sale! Among them, there was a blue-and-grey-striped one that was definitely the one Jenny made for our oldest grandchild last Christmas.
\It was clear from the expression on her face. She stretched out and caressed the fabric softly, and her heart broke. She tried to hide her pain with a grin and a repression of tears. Her voice was barely audible as she said, “It’s okay, I understand that kids might be embarrassed to wear grandma’s sweaters.” I could hardly contain my emotions as I drew her closer for an embrace, realizing how hurt she was. No, this wasn’t acceptable, and unfortunately for our family, my wife was more understanding than I was. They committed a heartless, destructive, and blatantly cruel act! Even though she maintained her composure, I couldn’t help but feel furious! Once I was sure she was asleep, I went back to the thrift store that evening and bought back everything she had made! I had made up my mind to put this right. I made the decision to impart a significant life lesson to our grandchildren without even speaking to my wife! One that would instill in them the value of showing gratitude for future blessings. I made a package for each grandchild the following day. I put wool, knitting needles, and a basic set of knitting instructions inside each. I added a picture of the sweater they had thrown away along with a severe note that said, “I know what you did.” You had better start knitting your own gifts now!”Grandma and I are coming for dinner, and you better be wearing her presents,” I said in my note. Alternatively, I’ll notify your parents and you won’t receive any further gifts for birthdays or Christmas. As one could guess, there was a wide range of reactions! A few of the grandchildren apologized sheepishly over the phone. They acknowledged that they were unaware of the significance of these gifts. Some remained mute, maybe feeling awkward or not knowing what to say. But the point had been made. When dinnertime finally arrived, there was a palpable sense of excitement. Our grandkids arrived one by one. All of them wearing the sweaters that nobody thought were worthy. To be very honest, some of the art they produced was absurdly poor! The one short design and one long hand made me chuckle uncontrollably! Some sweaters were obviously dropped mid-project, while others were simply too large! Not a single reproduction could have done MY Jenny’s original work justice. When sincere regret was expressed through their apologies, the tension subsided. Our oldest grandchild stated to their parents, “We are so sorry for taking your gifts for granted, Grandma,” while their parents watched. “We swear never to give away anything you’ve lovingly made for us ever again.” They made an attempt at knitting. They became aware of the passion and work that went into every stitch as a result. “Our oldest grandchild admitted that this was harder than he had anticipated, Grandpa.”
He continued tugging at the sleeves of his hurriedly constructed attempt as he spoke. Another person said, “Yeah, I’m sorry, Grandma,” with wide eyes. “It took me hours to finish one section of a scarf!” Bless her heart, my wife pardoned them, giving each one her customary warmth and compassion. “I’m amazed you got them to do this much!” Jenny loved our grandchildren and turned to face me. I needed to take action, my darling. I couldn’t allow them to believe that your gifts were just throwaway objects. I knew I had made the right decision when we embraced and she opened her warm heart to me. The laughter increased and the mood lightened as we ate dinner. This difficult lesson bonded everyone. It served as a helpful reminder of the importance of recognizing and appreciating one another’s work. Ultimately, our grandchildren gained knowledge about love, respect, and the elegance of a handcrafted gift in addition to learning how to knit a basic stitch. My wife felt better when she saw that her efforts were eventually recognized. I discovered how much of an impact she had on bringing our family together. The grandchildren added one more thing as we were wrapping up our dinner: “We promise to cherish our handmade gifts forever.” A promise that brought my wife more warmth than any sweater could have! I said to them, “I have one last surprise for you all,” before I left. I ran to the car and returned with a bunch of big plastic bags. “Open them,” I told our grandchildren. When they discovered every sweater Jenny had given them, they were all beaming with happiness. When they transitioned from their awful attempts at knitting to the flawless sculptures my wife had made them, they were like completely different persons. “Grandma and grandpa, thank you so much!” they exclaimed as they gave us a warm hug before we left. The spouse of a woman in the following tale was in need of some important life lessons. Before she put her foot down, he had developed the poor habit of making purchases—big and small—without getting her approval.
Dad & fiancée exclude his daughter from their wedding after she bought a dress & shoes for it
Reddit is the place where people share stories of their life and ask fellow redditors for advice and opinion on the decision they make.
A teenage girl recently shared that her dad and his wife-to-be excluded her from their wedding and she explained the reasons behind that heartbreaking decision.
“I (f18) was always pretty close to my dad. Closer to my mom but I often visited my dad (about 3-4 times a week). A few years ago he started dating “Anna”. Anna and I always got along when my dad proposed I was happy Anna seemed like she would be a great stepmom,” she started her post.
OP said that she was overly excited and was looking forward to the wedding. She bought a dress and shoes, but then her dad told her that he and his fiancée needed to talk to her about something important.
“Well a few weeks before the wedding after I had bought everything (dress, shoes, etc) my dad and Anna said they needed to “talk to me” Anna and my dad decided to have a child free wedding which I get especially for young kids.
“Well turns out child-free means no one under 18. On the day of the wedding, I was still going to be 17 so, therefore, I’m not allowed to be at the wedding because Anna wants to stay true to the child-free rule even for the daughter of the groom and her about-to-be stepdaughter.”
Devastated, OP told her mom what her dad and Anna said to her. The mom was as heartbroken as her daughter and decided to take her on vacation so that she cheer up. At the same time, the mom told the rest of the family what her ex-husband did to their daughter. Understandably, most of them were shocked and angry.
Later, OP posted birthday pictures on Facebook and wrote, “I’m so glad my dad and Anna didn’t allow me at their wedding since I was under 18; I feel more mature since yesterday.”
“The family was freaking out asking if that was true and bashing my dad and Anna. I later got a bunch of texts from my dad and Anna calling me immature and a selfish brat and that’s why I was too immature to be at a wedding. I was talking to some friends and they said I was kinda an AH for doing that and I should have just let it go.”
Fellow redditors shared their opinions and agreed that OP wasn’t an AH for telling the family what her dad did to her.
“NTA. What kind of man doesn’t have his own child at his wedding? Anyway, they made the choice, if they believe it was the right choice they should have no issue about it being publicly known. Plus, people might well assume you weren’t there because you disapproved of his new wife or chose a vacation instead. Ensuring people know WHY you weren’t there saves your own reputation,” one person commented.
“The no children was made for you. I’m sorry but let that sink in. She made that rule to keep you out. You now know where you stand in their marriage…you don’t. I’m so sorry. NTA. I personally think it was EPIC. Harsh but epic. They deserved more than that. I would even update it with pictures of their texts,” another added.
A third wrote, “I can’t help but wonder if she purposefully pick a date before OP birthday just so she couldn’t go. If the dad & step-mom wanted to make it child free but make sure OP was there they could have made sure the date was AFTER OP birthday but to make it just 2 days before….. nah they didn’t want her there & was just trying to use that as an excuse.”
We believe the dad was not right for excluding his own daughter from the wedding.
What are your thoughts on this?
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