Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer.
Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.
Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Dear Ex-Husband,
Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been.
I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work.
I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!
Please share this story with your friends and family if you think it was funny.
Entitled Couple Took My Premium Seat on the Plane – I Taught Them a Lesson and Turned It into a Profit
When I went out of my way to get one of the best seats on my flight, I didn’t expect to be swindled out of it by a manipulative couple. But what they didn’t know was that they messed with the wrong person, and in the end, I was the victor!
As soon as I settled into my aisle seat, feeling quite pleased with the extra legroom I had carefully selected for this long flight, I noticed a couple approaching. Little did I know that my interaction with them would lead to me teaching them an important lesson. Here’s my tale that can teach you how to stand up for yourself against bullies. Read on…
A woman at the airport | Source: Midjourney
The woman who approached me was in her late thirties, dressed in a designer outfit that screamed wealth. But her expression was anything but pleasant. Her husband, tall and broad-shouldered, walked slightly behind her with an air of arrogance that matched her demeanor.
They stopped right next to me, and the woman’s eyes zeroed in on my seat. Without so much as a polite greeting and while exuding entitlement, she rudely demanded, “You need to switch seats with me. I accidentally booked the wrong seat, and I refuse to sit away from my husband.”
A mean couple trying to swindle a premium airplane seat | Source: Midjourney
I blinked, taken aback by her tone. She spoke as if her mistake was somehow MY problem to fix! I glanced at her boarding pass, which confirmed my suspicion. It was a middle seat in row 12, not even close to the premium one I had chosen!
When I didn’t immediately comply, the woman rolled her eyes dramatically.
“Come on, it’s just a seat. YOU don’t need all that space,” she scoffed dismissively at my hesitation, her tone dripping with condescension.
A rude and arrogant woman on a plane | Source: Midjourney
Her husband, standing behind her with his arms crossed, smirked as he added, “Yeah, be reasonable. We need to sit together, and you don’t really need to be up here, do you?”
The audacity of their request left me momentarily speechless. They were clearly arrogant and hadn’t even bothered to ask nicely. They just assumed I would give in to their demands. I could feel the other passengers’ eyes on us, some curious, others sympathetic.
I took a deep breath, weighing my options. A confrontation wasn’t something I wanted to deal with, especially not at the start of a six-hour flight.
An upset woman sitting in her seat | Source: Midjourney
“Alright,” I said with as much calm as I could muster. Standing up, I handed over my boarding pass while trying hard to hide my irritation. “Enjoy the seat,” I told them without meaning it.
The woman snatched the ticket from my hand with a satisfied smirk. She muttered something under her breath about people in premium seats being “So selfish.” Her husband supported her by saying, “Someone like her doesn’t even need it.”
A happy couple sitting on a plane | Source: Midjourney
As I made my way toward the back of the plane, where her assigned seat was, I could feel my blood boiling. But I wasn’t one to make a scene. I had a better idea. Just as I approached row 12, a flight attendant, who had been watching the whole exchange, intercepted me.
She leaned in, her voice low as she whispered, “MA’AM, YOU DO REALIZE THIS WAS A SCAM, RIGHT? THEY TRICKED YOU OUT OF YOUR BETTER SEAT! THEY’RE BOTH MEANT TO BE IN ROW 12!”
I smiled at her, the anger simmering down to a cool resolve. “I know. But I’m about to turn the tables.”
A woman talking to a flight attendant | Source: Midjourney
“I actually have a little trick up MY sleeve. Don’t worry, I’ve got this,” I said as I winked.
The flight attendant raised an eyebrow, but she didn’t press further as she quickly put two and two together and tried stifling a laugh. She directed me to my new seat. So, as soon as I reached my middle seat and sat down, I started forming my plan.
The premium seat had been booked using my frequent flyer miles, and with that came certain privileges that most passengers wouldn’t be aware of. I knew exactly what to do to teach those two bullies a lesson they’d never forget…
A woman plotting while sitting in her seat | Source: Midjourney
My middle seat in row 12 wasn’t close to being as comfortable as the premium one I had given up, but I knew it would all be worth it. I allowed the mean couple to enjoy the seat and think they’d won.
About an hour into the flight, when the cabin had settled into a comfortable hum of quiet conversations and the occasional clink of glasses, I signaled for the flight attendant who had spoken to me earlier. She approached, and I asked to speak with the chief purser.
A flight attendant talking to a passenger | Source: Midjourney
She nodded with a knowing smile and disappeared, returning moments later with a woman who exuded authority.
“Good afternoon, ma’am. I understand there was an issue with your seating,” the chief purser said, her voice professional but warm.
I explained my situation calmly, emphasizing how I had been moved from my premium seat due to the couple’s deception. The purser listened carefully, her expression serious.
When I finished, she nodded and said, “I appreciate you bringing this to my attention. Please give me a moment.”
A chief purser talking to a passenger | Source: Midjourney
I noticed a few passengers paying close attention to what was happening. They must have figured that I was retaliating in some way and didn’t want to miss anything. They hilariously kept throwing glances in my direction and at the departing purser.
When the head stewardess walked away, she left me wondering what my next move should be. A few minutes later, she returned, but instead of an apology, she offered me a choice.
A chief purser talking to a passenger | Source: Midjourney
“Ma’am, you have two options. You can either return to your original seat, or we can compensate you for the inconvenience with a significant amount of airline miles, equal to upgrades on your next three flights.”
I pretended to consider it, but I already knew what I wanted. “I’ll take the miles,” I said, smiling inwardly at the thought of the extra benefits this would bring. I knew fully well that the miles were worth far more than the price difference between premium and economy on this flight.
A woman thinking | Source: Midjourney
The purser smiled and made a note on her tablet. “It’s done. And as a token of goodwill, we’ve upgraded your next flight to first class.”
“Thank you,” I replied, genuinely pleased. As she walked away, I settled back into my seat, a sense of satisfaction washing over me. I knew the couple up front had no idea what was coming.
The flight continued without incident until we began our descent. That’s when I noticed a flurry of activity around row 3, where the couple sat. The chief purser, accompanied by another flight attendant had made their way to them, their expressions serious.
A chief purser and a flight attendant walking together | Source: Midjourney
“Excuse me, Mr. Williams and MISS Broadbent,” the purser began, her tone no longer friendly. She pronounced the woman’s title with emphasis, making it clear to all aboard that the couple weren’t even married!
“We need to address an issue with your seats,” she continued looking quite stern.
Broadbent’s smile faltered, and Williams looked genuinely puzzled.
“What do you mean?” she asked, her voice tinged with irritation.
Shocked passengers | Source: Midjourney
The purser glanced at her tablet before continuing. “We’ve been informed that you manipulated another passenger into switching seats with you, which is a violation of our airline’s policy. This is a serious offense.”
The color drained from the woman’s face, and she stammered, “But… but we didn’t do anything wrong! We just asked to switch seats!”
“Unfortunately,” the purser interrupted, “we have clear reports of your behavior. Upon landing, you’ll need to go with security for further questioning.”
A serious chief purser talking to passengers | Source: Midjourney
All the passengers had wide eyes as they absorbed all the drama!
“Also, lying about being married when you are not to manipulate other passengers, is problematic in its own way. Additionally, due to this breach, you will be placed on our airline’s no-fly list pending an investigation,” the purser continued.
Williams opened his mouth to protest, but no words came out. The flight attendants, already poised to act, ushered them out of their seats and toward the back of the plane. As they were escorted, Broadbent felt the need to defend herself.
An angry passenger shouting on a plane | Source: Midjourney
“I might not be his wife now, but I will be in a few months! He is going to divorce his wife to be with me!” she yelled frantically.
A collective shock settled among all of us as we realized the two were having an affair!
The crew took them where they would be the first to be escorted off by airport security.
As I gathered my belongings after landing, I couldn’t resist glancing at the couple one last time. Their smug expressions were gone, replaced by a mix of anger and humiliation.
A happy woman gathering her luggage before disembarking from a plane | Source: Midjourney
They had lost more than just a seat as they were now facing consequences that would follow them long after this flight. Walking through the airport, I couldn’t help but smile to myself.
In my 33 years of life, I’ve realized that sometimes, getting even isn’t about making a big spectacle to get your way; it’s about patiently watching those who think they’ve won realize just how badly they’ve lost!
A pleased woman leaving the airport | Source: Midjourney
And that’s how it’s done, folks! If you enjoyed my story or even felt a little empowered by it, you’ll LOVE this next one! Julia thought she had a good friend in Janet until the latter showed her true colors after borrowing the former’s special item. Like me, Julia got revenge by teaching Janet a lesson she’ll never forget!
This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.
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